To hurt or to be not hurt is a choice. We make such choices, stemming from our quality of thoughts. The way we have been parented also counts. The way we socialise, the way we learn, too. The choice to hurt others often transcends, and thus humanity is in a huge mess. But the important question is not why do people hurt? The need of the hour is to actually reflect on the way we respond and react to those who hurt us.
Ceteris paribus, people are going to hurt. No matter how, when, why and where, but in these vast complexities, humans are tending to be this way. Even if ‘ axial age ‘ is iterated, stupidity will never fail to disappoint us whole.
Thanks for opting to read this blog. I shall grimly tell you how emotional and mental pain are more painful than physical pain. To begin with, physical pain is curable as we can locate its position. Whereas, emotional and mental pain often flummox us. You can say that it’s all the calculation of dopamine, serotonin, etc at play but there’s more to this story.
We try to imitate what films or media tell us
All those commercialised movies have subtly done a great job in fooling the fools. Between the lines, don quixote films have shaped our subconscious mind to a huge extent. Eventually, we end up creating such unachievable imagination and mental stimulation in real life and then paint ourselves with planned disappointments: ‘expectations’
We believe that everything is going to stay same
Buddha was not an incoherent man to have taught that ‘everything is subjected to decay or impermanence’. The very idea that everything will stay the same or static has led many humans to believe that their status, privilege, etc would not change and thus they end up ‘desiring’ for more. This generates a ‘rat race’ of irrational whirlpools.
We think that “I” exist
Buddhist wisdom on emptiness is something widely misunderstood. Because ‘mass society’ has been operationally trained to think and act more materially. That’s why we see egotism in abundance and empathy in deficit. Our own choices beget such a ‘kalyuga’, today! But as long as we continue to conclude that this ‘self’ is not empty of itself, we will hurt ourselves more.
The ‘self’ is nothing but an aggregation of form, sensation, appearance, delusions, etc. It is an outcome of our consciousness but the ‘self’ is not consciousness or vice-versa. The ‘self’ actually lacks intrinsic properties of its own and it’s thus interdependent, so this “I” is basically a void.
We think time is not a delusion
Often, we dwell either in the past or in future, but little do we live in the moment? There is suddenly a surge in McMindfulness but yet these ‘spiritual celebs’ have failed to explain to us all that why are we attached to the concept of time? If time exists, then so is the solidity of this infinity. If infinity exists, so is everything real. If everything is real, we are highly deluded.
Time may exist in your alarm clock, but it is not a parameter to quantify your disappointment with it. There are individuals who use ‘time’ to qualify their emotional and mental pain but little do they know that time is nothing but an ever-changing phenomenon. The same river that you step in next time is not the same this ‘time’.
We cling!
It’s humane to attach as we’re ‘sentient beings’ too. But, why do we ‘cling’ behind this attachment? While those who know to live detached, but with empathy, are accused of coldness. This is not always a true case. In this blog, I elaborated in meso and meta ways why I cannot be hurt anymore. It’s not because that I have been hurt multiple times to come to this realisation but it’s majorly due to my subitist tendencies that has also taught me that ‘everything is nothing’ and no iota of anyone’s validation can approve my idea of not reacting and responding to those who hurt me.
On a quick note, do not hold on to your breath. Learn to release it. When unnecessary guests come into your life, don’t hurt yourself by serving them more tea.
